rubbish proposal

people always say time is under your control

time management and planning are important

time constraint is just an excuse

alot of times are putting on that

though it is over and it should be over

but in fact it is not

i did put effort on it

well, may be other people put more than me

feeling sad...abit...when the works need to be upgraded again

i really do not feel like to do it anymore, already put too much of time on it

so now how many sleepless night again? or reduce how many

sleeping hours?

i totally tension...tension to the maximum

tension with the works that i hate, that i really not interested with

in fact, i still have to face it everyday and keep telling myself "u can do it", "u like it"

can i just left it don't upgrade it? it may just a rubbish proposal for all the examiners

i has planned, i planned eveything, planned for my time to meet all the deadlines

planning is nothing without implementation

i know about this

i implemented it and even not dare to go for what i wish to do even just go out for a dinner with the feeling of guilty when it cannot be finished on time

not dare to go home to see my lovely family although i miss them so so much

im not genius and so hope that i am

struggling for thesis and at the same time there are non stop coming tasks

2 more weeks for the draft

but now what is my findings?

i can finish it if and only if i have a sleepless body

if and only if im a robotic human

how i wish there is 48 hours per day

im not giving excuses but i am human

i wish can work non-stop also without the feeling of tiredness

she told me," all these are just the process that u have to go through, take it easy, when u free abit, come back home, i cook something delicious for u"

he told me," no need to worry about us, focus on ur works, the most important is able to graduate"

the little gal told me," i know u very stress, come, i tell u some jokes"

im fighting for them....